MY SINS BLOCK MY DUA

As I sit here alone, the tears rolling down my face
It is not salt, but pain that I taste

So I leave now to go stand before You
I am helpless and alone, what else can I do?

I have asked, I have begged but my sins block my du'a
I will come now still begging, forgive me O Allah

Forgive me and grant me what it is that I ask
For me it is impossible but for You a simple task

I try and I try but I do not succeed
But I understand and know it is because Your Words I do not heed

I hear, yes I hear but I do not always obey
Perhaps that is why I am destitute, isolated and why You have written that I will be alone this way

I have no to blame but the person in the mirror I see
No one else must pay for my sins, no one else, no one else, no one else but me

So I stand before You to again beg forgiveness because You said that I can
You have told us in Your Book that You are Ar-Rahman

I will ask, I will beg but my sins block my du'a
But I will keep asking, forgive me O Allah...

My dream is to work at the orphanage. dip or deg..no matter how high i reach, i just wanna be back to earth..please ibu..i NEED this.. ='/

ppl neglect health to work hard for money.

but when they fall ill, they use the money for health.

and when they're fine, they work hard again, till they fall ill. and the cycle continues.

To this world and the Hereafter. And they ask you about orphans. Say, "Improvement for them is best. And if you mix your affairs with theirs - they are your brothers. And Allah knows the corrupter from the amender. And if Allah had willed, He could have put you in difficulty. Indeed, Allah is Exalted in Might and Wise. (Surah Al-Baqarah : 220)

A good friend who wants to open up a pet store. Sonia Arjan Gawade's post. =]

''I wish I don't have to study for a degree I know that won't take me far. Its frustrating when I know what truly is my passion but I cannot pursue it due to circumstances. Paper is just paper. My happiness is solely for me to feel and enjoy. I just don't want to die not knowing this happiness I crave. Imagine waking up and doing something you love. I wanna do that. I'm tired of waking up and going to lectures..listening about theories...hypothesis etc etc....learning complicated formulas...I really for once just want to concentrate on my happiness.''

''even if i got a degree, earn big bucks..do you think I will be happy? should I just quit? or stay in school and live this fake life?''

FROM SYAZA MAJID'S FACEBOOK NOTE. =]

We say a simple Salaam to anyone, we’re rewarded..

We smile at someone, we’re rewarded..

We treat someone with kindness, we’re rewarded..

We pray in Masjid with Jamaah, we are rewarded 27 times more than those who pray alone..

We begin anything with Bismillaah, that action of us is rewarded..

We end our activities with Alhamdulillah, we’re also rewarded..

We think of doing a good deed, we’re rewarded..

We control our temper, we’re rewarded..

We eat and drink with our right hand, we’re rewarded..

We pray for forgiveness and health for our fellow Muslims, we’re rewarded..

We forgive, we’re rewarded..

We think positive towards Allah and other people, we’re rewarded..

We keep our promises, wer’re rewarded..

We seek knowledge for the benefit of others, we’re rewarded..

We share knowledge to others in need, we’re rewarded..

We walk towards the Jum’ah prayer, our each step is very greatly rewarded..

We take wudhu’, we are rewarded..

We treat our mothers and fathers with humbleness, kindess and respect, we’re greatly greatly rewarded..

We bring Allah to rememberance, we’re rewarded..

So why do we withhold our reward ?

AND WHO DARE SAY GOD IS UNFAIR? LIFE IS UNFAIR?

didnt sleep the whole night. cousins and uncle were at my house watching chelsea vs Liverpool.
great match.great night. some then slept as they have work or school. but some chitchatted in the living room in the dark til dawn. talked bout blackops. friends (saddening). life. history and discovery channel. haha.

then til 7.and i slept for an hour.
mum called and asked me to bathe.
we went shoppping!
at mustafa (my jeans and dad's dartboard),sim lim (for my recovery disc),imm(kitchen stuffs),arab street (for my jubah and songkok).
since i didnt have enough rest. i was super restless. and i had to walk around following parents around. kinda no mood. and i felt bad. i tsk at some orders from parents.
and at golden landmark then i began to think and remind myself 'that's my mum'.
and wow, i felt better. i never meant to perform such behaviours towards em. its sinful. and even by tsk-ing. God disallows it. and im sorry.

sometimes it happen too fast that u dont have time to think. but u do have time to re-think and ask for forgiveness.


Abu Huraira reported that a person said: Allah's Messenger (peace be upon him) who amongst the people is most deserving of my good treatment? He said: Your mother, again your mother, again your mother, then your father, then your nearest relatives according to the order (of nearness) (Muslim Book 32, Number 6181)

''With your kindness you can touch the deepest of one's heart''



i want... =/

When i think bout my life, i feel like crying..
I look around me...my friends...my cousins...my family...
and yes, just like many, i want to turn back time..
but its impossible..when i was a child, i did asked God to turn it back.
in my head, 'Dear Allah, when i wake up,the next day,please bring me to another time before this'
and then i closed my eyes...
the next morning,first thing i did was to check the time and date.
nothing's changed.
i very well know that God is the best planner. but im struggling.
All i can do now is pray for a better life. i may look happy,hyper,crazy most of the time.

but im lonely...lonely as in... for now, only God understands...

You know i did it for ur own good. i didnt even scold you. but i guessed u took it wrongly...
You cant even give me the benefit of having a conversation.
well i tried, didnt i?

HAHAHA SO CUTE THIS UNCLE WHO'S IN CHARGE OF MY RACE'S FB.
DONT KNOW WHO THOUGH ^^ SEE WHAT HE SPELLED MY NAME AS. BUT HIS THOUGHT IS ALL THAT MATTERS, THANK YOU MR.GJTS !

FROM KAKAK NURUL HUDA :']

only read this email if youre free.
since Im bored. Here am i thinking and staring on the screen of my pc.

Ive got no card. no cliché shit stuff on facebook wall.
yes, tak abes2 facebook but all i have is this email which will tell u all.

So, bro, youre 19 today. Any wish youd like to say?
like a change in you or a change in us any way.

Guiding us to the right path and helping us all, quoting words frm quran.
I like that, good for us and you, hopefully that will deviate us away from the setan.

Or even to demolish that ''super massive black hole" in our hearts, nah, not that song from Muse.
In fact, its that black dot in our heart, if not, we'll be on the lose.

Do send me that meaningful quran quotes and keep your prayers for your family and friends.
Ill do the same in return, helping us moving foward, hoping that this wouldnt be only a dream or a pretend.

Its our life, hadith once say: we are what our friends are.
So you choose best, even if its only a friend, so we'll be on par.
On par, With those on the right path as stated in al fatihah.

So, since im the last to wish you a happy birthday. Last yr.
I hope this year ill be few of the first, cause i know there will be the first, this year.

U have a great 19th! Enjoy life w Allah by your side.
Insyallah, everything will be alright.

Wealth and Health.
Study and of course being Happy

Few will deserve it all.
but only He, shall have the last call.
Good Luck!


HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY HAZIQ!
you'll never walk alone

Assalamualaikum,
Huda

Complete Your 5 Prayers....You Would Eat Alot But Not Drink At All? Care For Your Body But Not Care For Your Soul?..Like How You Care For This World Not For Your Afterlife? Most Humans React Only To What's Obvious/Clear,We're Hungry,We Eat. We Fail,We Study. See Our Parents Sad,We Pity Them...But Many Don't Know How Much Our Souls Need To Be Purified, Through Prayers. Or How Much Our Prophet S.A.W Suffered. For US.

I Feel The Heavy Breath On My Liverpool's Blanket..
Once In A While,My Heart Still Hurts..
Cik Nah Said It's The Air That's Stinging My Heart Every Now & Then..Painful.
& I Still Do Get 'Crushed' Whenever I'm Trying To Sleep.






Ya Allah, Protect Me.

*pssst* dont stop the music..listen to it while reading this :)

I happened to read ur blog.
and now i understand roughly what ure going through.
first and foremost, im sorry to hear it.know it.read it.
maybe i dont deserve to know.
i mean, who am i right?
hahah..foreigner out of ur problems..
but maybe, God wants me to know.
maybe i could help. but i know im just a powerless human being just like all of us without Allah.
& i hope i can borrow as much power as possible...just to help u thru it.
someone we know says, shes running out of words to encourage you..
but i tell you, she wont run out of energy to support you..we all wont.
like i said again, God brings us to you. and we wont disappoint you.
& we're expecting you not to disappoint urself ....is that alright?

I hate it.... seeing ppl who are dear to me being very upset..for days & days..
i know its hard to get over it & solve it..
im not asking u to quickly end it.cos its impossible..
but im telling you that im by ur side.forever (even if you dont need me,im still gonna be a pest,just to make sure u are alright)
i will do what i can,with all my heart & my strengths to put u back into one piece. with an elephant glue.stronger than ever.

all i ask of you is..PATIENCE.
Allah works in mysterious ways... it might seem like it's destroying our life.. but just to remind you,He's not...

"And certainly, We shall test you with something of fear, hunger, loss of wealth, lives and fruits, but give glad tidings to As-Sabirun (the patient)". (2:155)

"Only those who are patient shall receive their reward in full, without reckoning.'' (39:10)

honestly, i too was down. and wanted to cry as well after knowing bout this. work just now wasnt too good either as i kept thinking bout it. i was thinking of how i want to help you. yes,i want to help. i really do. for you. your mum. your family. after all, she is one of my best teachers. :) but of course im not going to her and advise/encourage..bla bla.. ure the main source,so i'll go to you. and you, revive the spirit of your family. you may be young. but in there,i know..lies a very strong person character to be unleashed.

"And verily, whosoever shows patience and forgives, that would truly be from the things recommended by Allah.'' (42:43)

and keep this in mind, just being patient alone wont help. ive told u what to do right? how to be calm..how to think positive etc.. always keep in mind that whatever negative things that ure thinking of right now, is the work of the devil. BUT the devil is only working well because of the permission from Allah swt. if you passed His (Allah's) trial, u get ur reward. simple as that. but HOW u do it, is a different thing. thats harder. for now. practice. everything is about practice.

O you who believe! seek assistance through patience and prayer; surely Allah is with the patient. (2:153)

i know im not that of a good person as well. im dirty. im stupid. im a disaster. im a cheat. im a hypocrite. & simply say, im the devil u dont wanna meet.know.talk to.

whatever i do now, even if the deeds are as high as the mountains, i dont think i deserve Allah's forgiveness still.....hmmm...but we know How merciful Allah swt is..& im glad that He is..but im still not sure if he has forgiven me for what ive done in the past or not. i mean, if humans were to know..i can bet you,not many will forgive me. not many will acknowledge me as they would before. & all that i have left is Allah..and the teachings of Muhammad s.a.w.

i came from Him (Allah)..and i surely will return to Him. i will do my best. to be a better person every single day. and i will do my best to keep YOU on the safe road. i will strive for Islam. for Muslims like you. and for all that is good.

"And surely, We shall try you till We test those who strive hard (for the Cause of Allah) and As-Sabirun (the patient)'' (47:31)

I promise.
I will not make u lose.
I will not make u lost.
I will not make u be the person who is in loss.
InsyaAllah.

Verily, man is in loss, except those who believe and do good deeds and encourage one another towards truth and encourage one another towards patience. (104:2-3)

This is Jihad For You. Win It.
ive sent u the sms right? (bout Jihad)
if not..do ask from me.. heh.

so i guess ive spoken what i should spoke.
its all in ur hands now.
we'll be behind you.
i will pray for you.
I Love You.
Allah Loves You More. Do It For Us. (y)

Never Lose Faith In God & Yourself.

Out Of All of My Friends & Families, You're One Of Them Who Really Appreciate Me. I Thank You For That. Im Not Gonna Let You Down Either.

*by now,the song on my blog should've stopped,or maybe not =] *
----------------------------------------------------------
Keep the lyrics in your head.wherever u are,in whatever situation...and u will not forget God.

When you feel all alone in this world
And there’s nobody to count your tears
Just remember, no matter where you are
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you're carrying a monster load
And you wonder how far you can go
With every step on that road that you take
Allah knows
Allah knows

CHORUS
No matter what, inside or out
There’s one thing of which there’s no doubt
Allah knows
Allah knows
And whatever lies in the heavens and the earth
Every star in this whole universe
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you find that special someone
Feel your whole life has barely begun
You can walk on the moon, shout it to everyone
Allah knows
Allah knows

When you gaze with love in your eyes
Catch a glimpse of paradise
And you see your child take the first breath of life
Allah knows
Allah knows

CHORUS

When you lose someone close to your heart
See your whole world fall apart
And you try to go on but it seems so hard
Allah knows
Allah knows

You see we all have a path to choose
Through the valleys and hills we go
With the ups and the downs, never fret never frown
Allah knows
Allah knows

CHORUS (x2)

BRIDGE:
Every grain of sand,
In every desert land, He knows.
Every shade of palm,
Every closed hand, He knows.
Every sparkling tear,
On every eyelash, He knows.
Every thought I have,
And every word I share, He knows.
Allah knows.

I Guess I'm Back..
& I Hope For A Very Long Time.
I.WANT.TO.CHANGE.
For My Friends,Families & Especially God.
Looking Around Me,Truly Is Hurtful.

Everyone knows IT'S NEAR...but what do they do? nothing at all.
more ignorant. stronger hypocrite than before..
should i sigh? or shud i hold on to this hadith??

Allah's Apostle said, "If Allah wants to do good to somebody, He afflicts him with trials."

for now, i'll do my best to hold on to it.

"A time will come when people will run away from religious men in the same manner as they would run away from a dead donkey." [Riyad-un-Nasikhin: P356]

reading this, hurt me as well..why oh why?
its literally happening. my era. NOW.

Doomsday will not come until a man satisfies his sexual need with another man and a woman satisfies her sexual need with another woman. [Hatib]

even muslim ppl are doing this..no,dont tell me its modern thinking..
Quran never change.
we dont have new testaments anymore...so why should we?
we're globalised tooo much..westernized wayyyy too much..
brainwashed our own thinkings..
who's to blame?
i'll say ourselves for not being strong enough..

OMG been so busy. especially during ramadhan. nothing to post though i have alot.
do apologise for everything. aint fun anymore here i guess. =] i will take some time soon to blog bout life. thank u.

Now i know what my parents feel when they wake up 3am in the morning everyday (except monday) to go to work.
Now i know what it feels like to love God.
I now understand why my parents never miss a single prayer.
and why everytime my mum remind me to pray.
yes,i was annoyed.irritated. just like most of you.
cos we LOVE this world too much,not thinking bout anything else.
entertainment,pleasure,peers...

but now i ive realised.ive noticed. ive known.
and it hurts me. for realising it abit too late.
for hurting them.
yet they didnt complain at all.

Thank you Allah SWT for giving this chance. for me to repay everything back. give me more time,i ask of you. i need this. show me more signs and open my heart.

OPEN MY HEART

*STRICTLY FOR MUSLIMS ONLY*

Memang Syaitan Dan Jin Sangat Kuat Menghasut Orang2 Seluruh Dunia Untuk Menghapuskan Orang2 Islam.
Mereka Sudah Berjanji. Dan Semuanya Sudahpun Berlaku. Sudah Terlalu Banyak.
Haziq Berdoa Agar Semua Orang2 Islam Bangun Dan Sedar Bahawa Sudah Masanya Kami Berlawan Dalam Nama Allah SWT. Bukan Sesama Manusia Tetapi Kepada Jin-Jin Dan Syaitan Yang Terkutuk.

Open Your Eyes. IT'S HAPPENING. Kiamat. Sampai Bile? Sampai Bile Nak Macam Gini?
Everyone's Dying. Humans Against Humans. NO Respect At All.
And We,In Fits Of Anger, We Scold Them With Vulgarities. With Intentions Of Revenge. Nasty & Sinful Words. Isnt ALL THAT ARE WHAT THE SATANS AND JINS LOVE?
I Need All Of You To Open Your Eyes.Your Heart. I know I May Not Do Much...But I'm Trying.
Cos I Can Feel It Coming,Or Rather,LIke I Said,It's Happening.

Astaghfirullah Al Azeem...
Auzubillah Himinahsaiytan Nirrajiim...

If You're Not Gonna Listen Or Follow,I Cannot Say Don't Regret,Cos I Know Most Of Us Will If We Don't START NOW.

Trust Me On This My Fellow Believers. My Fellow Muslim.
You Know IT's True.

Aku berlindung kepada Allah dari gangguan syaitan, ( ** Sebutkan
namanya : Tsarbar / Dasim / Al-A'war / Maswath / Zalnabur ) yang
terkutuk, serta pengikut-pengikut dan anak-anaknya.

DO COMMENT THIS VIDEO ON MY Facebook :D hahah. sorry been busy. plus lazy to blog=]

Woah its been long. kinda.
hasty days for me.
for those who know,then yes.
those who dont,just pray for me and these to be gone.
waiting for the sunshine.
waiting for the rainbow.
waiting to get so high
cos right now im pretty low.

TAKEN 100% FROM MY COUSIN'S BLOG.
HAIKAL SYAH. Tookk It I BLoody Agree On Everything He's Said.
Blog Link

My Take on Things

A transgender is asking for acceptance on Yahoo, saying he/she is also human. Wow. If you can accept that body of yours as human then accept the freaking gender it was made into. Don't go around asking people to accept something you know they won't like. We know you are human and it's not as if we're going to kill you. You didn't exactly come down in a spaceship saying, ''We are sexually confused but we come in peace!''. We are just not going to accept because there is a flaw in your demands. You think we hate transsexualism out of ignorance. The real reason why we do is because there is a fine line between 'ACCEPTING' and 'EMBRACING'.

If I ACCEPT him/her and transsexualism, my child might grow up in a world where he/she thinks that it's ok to be like him/her. If my child decides to follow suit and EMBRACES the lifestyle then I'll only have myself to blame. So I'm sorry but ACCEPTANCE is too much to ask for. Take business for example. If the price of rice rises too much for people to tolerate, we could always boycott. Trust me the prices will fall again with patience. High supply with low demand means low costs. Not accepting transsexualism and homosexuality will act as a form of deterrence to more people than you think you could ever influence. If it only takes one man to start a war between nations, it is also possible that one person's change of opinion will go a long way in securing a brighter future for ourselves and future generations. Thank God Singapore isn't America.

The reason I'm blogging it and not posting this on FB is because of the screwed up word limit.